Chemo Princess

I don't know you. You are taller than me, slimmer than me, and paler than me. But you look determined every time I see you. You are always on the treadmill in that first row at the gym when I walk in most days. By the time I spy you it looks like you've already been running for at least half an hour. Your shirt is soaked and sweat is glistening on your beautiful bald head. Your focus and energy as you run is amazing and I always wonder what's going through your mind as you run, and run, and run. Where are you going? What is your goal?

Do you know that I have dubbed you my Chemo Princess? The moment I laid eyes on you I felt like you saved me in some way. To be honest, I was just so relieved that there was already one bald woman at my gym! I still had my short pixie cut when I first noticed you. I hadn't even started chemo yet - I think I was still a week away from starting. I was on a mission to establish my exercise regimen. I had taken my oncologist's advice to heart: switch to a Mediterranean diet (it's the healthiest one out there), try to exercise about five days a week, and drink lots and lots of water - all the time. So there I was walking into our gym that I hadn't really been to since I had Alyssa. I'm seriously doubting myself. Could I commit to going to the gym regularly (even for just half an hour for five days)? Could I go to the gym once I started chemo? And could I go to the gym once I was bald? The moment I saw you, Chemo Princess, I realized... yes. You broke ground for me. Thank you.

Whatever your reason for being bald (chemo, chronic hair loss, personal preference), in my mind, you are my Chemo Princess. I have created a story in my head about you; I have molded you into an idol - someone to emulate, someone to inspire me at the gym; you are a tangible reminder to me that I am not alone in this fight. That here is someone right in front me - only three or four machines away - going through what I'm going through and you are kicking ass. Mile after mile you sweat away the effects of chemo; I can too. Mile after mile you flush yourself with water hydrating yourself back to health; I can too. Mile after mile you are closer and closer to your goal - whatever your finish line might be; I can do that too.

I don't know that I'll ever try to talk to you. I wonder if as I walk past you in the morning either with my scarf on or my bald head, if you wonder about me too. Whatever your real story is, you have already given me the greatest gift any stranger could - you are there. And you can be whoever I need you to be for me. Thank you my Chemo Princess - and thank you to all the Chemo Princesses out there that have survived breast cancer and live every day reaching their goals, achieving those milestones, and living... just living for tomorrow.